to listen is an effort

There are an incredible number of women dealing with infertility, that is something that i have learned in the last few years. When i first had problems getting pregnant i had no one to talk to and didn't know anyone who could share their experience with me. It is so frustrating to have well-meaning friends/family approach me with their 'infertility' problems. There wish to have a baby that took MONTHS to conceive. Are you kidding me? months? Talk to me when you've gone years! I know they mean well but really, when you are standing there making dinner for your children and talking to me about the frustration you felt..........i'm sorry but i don't feel it, and i really don't think you have the slightest idea what i am going through. I know that these comments are meant to make me feel better but really they don't. It only makes me feel worse; that you don't seem to have even the vaguest idea what i am going through or what i have experienced. If you did, you would not make those comparisons. I will never have a child of my own. I have experienced 4 unbelievable losses in my journey to have children. I am jumping through hoops to have the chance to adopt a child through a system that is not very reliable. I have been hurt many times in the past by people who are honestly trying to make me feel better. It's hard to say: you know, you just hurt my feelings, made me angry and now i feel even more inadequate. I am sincerely happy for my friends/family who have had the pleasure of starting their family. I think it is wonderful to see them so happy and enjoying the milestones and accomplishments of their children. I would not wish anyone the pain that brian and i have gone through, the frustration and feelings of loss. I just ask for a little sensitivity when talking about your ability to get pregnant, and please don't compare your situation to mine. We all have individual stories and experiences that make up our lives, we should all try to be sensitive to the hardships and struggles of each individual. We are all unique, it is what makes us special, makes us friends and makes life more interesting. I love my friends/family and sometimes it is hard for me to say out loud what i am feeling, it's nice to have a place to write it all down and get it out. I hope no one takes this the wrong way, i really do appreciate the effort.