Friday, April 22, 2011

same old post, different day

No answers, no end in sight. Caseworker says there is nothing they can do right now. We are considered kinship and their only concern is that the child is okay.
She is with us, she is okay.
Caseworker is communicating with her supervisor and the county attorney and they say there is nothing they can do. According to them:
All's good.
No one cares that she is not getting the therapy she needs. No one cares if this is only temporary. No one cares that this could end any second. No one else is at home waiting for the phone to ring or the knock on the door. No one is as scared as i am that mom will say i'm here to get lovebug, see ya! No one else knows how i am on edge every second of the day just waiting for those words, knowing there is nothing i can do. No one knows how hard it will be for me to watch our lovebug leave our house once again. No one sees our lovebug's scared face and apprehension every time i ask her if she wants to talk to dada(mom's ex boyfriend) or mom. No one else hears her ask "i'm staying here, right?" No one else sees her relief knowing she is staying. Maybe they know, but they don't care. Maybe they know, but they can't do anything. Maybe they do know. Maybe. I feel like no one knows how i feel. I feel like there is no one else in the world who knows what i am going through.

I feel like people are tired of hearing about it, as much as i am tired of living it.

Every week i keep thinking something has to happen, a decision has to be made and every friday i get a call from the caseworker saying that they haven't heard from mom, there's nothing we can do. There is nothing they can do. Soooo.......we wait.

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