Wednesday, January 12, 2011
still no schedule
The caseworker finally made it over on monday to talk to our lovebug's mom. Sounds like mom wants to keep our lovebug still. I don't know what to think anymore. I don't understand how you send your child off to someone else's home 4 nights a week and still insist you want to parent and take care of that child. It makes no sense to me. She told the caseworker she just wants our lovebug happy and she thought if she spent more time with us then that would help. She said she wants us still involved and would never think of keeping our lovebug away from us, yet she sends me texts that say 'our lovebug needs to see us more or not at all' That sounds to me like she is willing to stop all contact. All we are asking for is a schedule to be set up so that our lovebug will know exactly when we will pick her up and when she will go home every week. A schedule will make it easier for all involved and i truly believe it would make it sooooo much easier for our lovebug to say goodbye to us if she knows when she will see us again. The caseworker supposedly told mom this in her own words and has 'encouraged' her to come up with a schedule. I am so confused and i am not only angry with the mom but with the caseworker for not making this stupid girl make a decision, stick to it and in the process get therapy for our lovebug. It's horrible what our lovebug has been through. She wants to live with us, she refuses to take anything from our home to her home. She squeals with delight when she sees us and cries heartbreaking tears when she leaves us. It is horrible and i am once again at a loss. This is ridiculous and i know that our lovebug needs some stability. The mom is once again refusing to answer her phone and won't answer my texts.So obviously we have not received any sort of a schedule and as of right now i have no idea when we will see our lovebug again. It is an awful feeling and i am sure our lovebug has the same anxiety and question - when will she see us again? It is so frustrating to have to deal with such immaturity and irresponsibility. GRRRRRR.....
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Just my 2 cents here- so take it for what it is- and you won't hurt my feeling if you tell me to shut up!
ReplyDeleteI found that when you back these biorth parents in a corner you lose. I get it that it is best for Love bug to have a schedule and to know when she will see you again- but I fear that contacting the case working and forcing Mom to make decisions she is not ready to make might scare her and take Lovebug and run.
You have to remember you are dealing with broken people- you will never fix them, they can't be fixed- and they cannot and will not make the best decision for their children- that is why they are where they are. I know you are trying really hard to help her- but she might think you are going behind her back and out to get her and take Lovebug away for good- and that will not be a good thing for anyone. Just be careful- play her game if it means you get to see your baby girl- keep the case worker in the loop- but try not to force Mom's hand- she will get tired of her from the sounds of it. Remember they are broken. Hugs.
i'm not real sure why the case worker is allowing this to continue like this. i think you need to talk to a supervisor. not to push mom farther into the corner, i see what kate is saying above. but....i just am not sure that mom is able to make or even knows what a schedule is. have you, or would you ever consider, talking to bonnie? i know people have definite opinions about her but i really feel like she listens -EVEN though she always initially responds in a VERY politically correct way and that pisses me off...but then things happen. i dunno. i can't believe this is STILL dragging out. STILL!
ReplyDelete